This is a story of how to make big bucks retargeting with Facebook
Boring. I know. Necessary. Yes.
Here’s the deal. Small business is tired and they’re tiring. They have nothing good to share about their business because they’re broke and broken. They wanted the 4-hour work week, instead they got the 4-hour sleep week.
The Goo Roos
The same story rolls off the tongue of the small business owner over and over and over again. You hire a Social Media Gooo Rooo in hopes they’ll cure your woes. They don’t. You’ve got no strategy and less of an idea of what the hell your brand says, but you’re dedicated to what you’ve spent your money on because it’s a personal fuck up and you’re not going to let it go.
Instead, you’re going to defend your stupid decision with a butcher knife and make everyone else look like idiots, blaming their work ethic when really it all has to do with the fact that you didn’t have a strategy going in and you didn’t delegate, but instead you abdicated your work in hopes the Goo Roo would make you look like a superstar.
You wanted to hand them shit in expectance they would come back with Poo Pourri, and you’re pissed off they didn’t.
It’s like asking Bernie Madoff to watch your bank account.
What you need is a dedicated copywriter, graphic artist, art director, PR director and CEO. But, first you really need a strategy.
What you want is a vacation. So instead you’ll go to the bar.
Because you’re going to do the same thing again and again and expect the same result, I’ll just give you this, you do with it what you want and then when you get tired of the bullshit, you can book a 30-minute strategy session where I’ll sell you on my services, and you’ll buy them because you need them.
Desperately.
But, not before you waste a ton of money on other bullshit $.02cent an hour Myanmar developers who don’t speak English who promise to make you money, but instead make you look like an ass hole online.
You’ll want to bargain with me, do a “deal” and get my amazing services at half price or less. Don’t bother. In the first 5 minutes I’ll make sure you’re the real deal. Otherwise, I’ll fake that I stubbed my toe just to get off the phone with you and promise to call you back, but I won’t. Buh Bye now…
Here’s your FREEBEEEEE because this whole adding value thing has got me creating excellent content that you’ll never read or take action on. Here ya go.
Why am I on Medium? To find clients who are interested. No, dedicated to strategically positioning their social media by delegating, not abdicating the tasks they aren’t good at and increasing their revenues by thinking a lot differently than what the mainstream is telling them to do.
Who am I? I’m Nicole Jolie. I’ve been doing this for 12 years and I’m pretty fucking good at what I do and I sometimes dig it too when I get super cool clients who are more interested in making money using social media as opposed to posting a bunch of organic shit out there in “hopes” that someone will click on it and buy their shit.
What’s my tag line? I stole it. I make small business big bucks with strategic social media that works. That doesn’t mean posting cat memes and stupid videos of the amazing shit that people do. It means you’re adding value to the community you serve. And yeah, you gotta serve them. They’re a bunch of people with insatiable “it’s all about me” appetites that don’t quit, and when you don’t give them what they want, they cry, bitch, moan and write nasty emails to your customer service team.
What can I do for you? Organize your social media strategy and help you make money (not instantly, it takes some time) using testing, optimization, and good ‘ole elbow grease. Yeah, that means that I don’t work for $.02cents an hour while you make millions at my expense.
If you knew it, you would do it. But you don’t and you won’t because you’re either 1) not interested 2) bitching about social media and all of the negative aspects about it 3) trying to figure out what to share and post and you’re too lazy to spend the time to make your own amazing content or 4) you’re having sex.
Why would you hire me? Because I’m not going to bullshit you. The air up your ass is saved for the beans you ate at lunch. I have no interest in making you a ton of money for $.02 cents an hour and I’m not running your business. You are. I am here to guide you through a myriad of bullshit hype and competitive as fuck big business who will steal your Bean-O and leave you farting in public.
Who’s my ideal client? The one who gets involved. The one who gives a shit about their business. The one who isn’t going to whine at me “this is frustrating and I didn’t think I had to do that…” bullshit.
My ideal client is the one who says, “Hell yeah! I want to make my brand on line look fucking killer and I know you’re going to guide me to do it and I’m not afraid of a few <scripts> here and there and getting involved in my Facebook page and making sure things test out correctly so my potential clients engage, buy, and want what I have.”
You can book a free 30-minute strategy session where I’ll decide in the 1st 5 minutes if you and I will be a fit. You can click this link HERE and we can have a chat.
